Technorati search

Thursday, January 26, 2006

Lynchburg Area Bank Robbery: The Three Stooges are Caught



It is refreshing to know that thieves in our area specialize in how to be stupid. Plus they watch a lot of TV. Take our recent case of a bank robbery that occurred at the corner of Timberlake road and Waterlick road. These thieves had a plan.

The plan was based on a stale plot format that is often found on TV. This is pretty much how it went.

Three Stooges Rob a Bank

The Planning Stage:

Moe (Randall Scott Mason): There must be money in that Sun Trust. Darn Convenience Stores only give us walking around money.

Curly (Jeffrey McCormick): Yeah, lets rob that bank but I am not going in.

Shep (David Frank Sprinkle): Just think of all the shinny things we could buy, lets rob it, I'll hide in the truck.

Moe: You guys are so chicken, if you want a job done right (wrong), I will do it myself.

Curly: What if they see the truck?

Moe: Well, lets swap to the van. Rob the bank with the truck and drive to the van.

Shep: That works, just like on TV they will be looking for the truck we will be in a van.

Moe: Its the big time now.

The Robbery:

From the News and Daily Advance:

"The teller gave the man a small amount of money and the man ran away, Gaddy said. Witnesses told police the robber got into a teal green Nissan pickup and headed west on Timberlake Road; police lost him in the Turkey Foot Road area, near New London, which is near the Bedford County line."

Other reports have said they dropped cash all over the place after the robbery. (reminder to crooks don't sew those holes in your pockets and never carry a bag for the money).

So good so far. The crooks dropped off the truck and were now using a van, who would be the wiser.

The Get Away:

Although, Turkey Foot Road is out in the sticks (according to city slicker standards) when the three stooges swapped the vehicles it did not go unnoticed by witnesses. Soon the crooks were motoring away in what they thought was their safe get away van.

The first time they were pulled over by the police it was for an expired inspection sticker. Some how they managed to resume their get away. Shortly afterwards they were pulled over again, this time the police suspected the van (from witness reports), but they were let go because of a lack of evidence. The third time was the charm and they were arrested for the bank robbery.

The Incarceration:

The News and Daily Advance further reports:

Randall Scott Mason has confessed to robbing the Zip Store on Lakeside Drive.

"Investigators are also looking into whether Mason and the two other men charged in connection with the bank robbery - Jeffrey McCormick of Evington and David Frank Sprinkle of Lynchburg - are connected to the string of Lynchburg convenience store robberies that have occurred during the past month. "

The Moral of the Story

You're worst enemy is your own stupidity. If you think you can rob a bank you failed the first question on test to become a Mensa member.

And remember, all suspects are considered innocent until proved guilty in a court of law, unless their own stupidity intercedes.

Sources:

The News and Advance This story and others on their website.

WSET both broadcast and written reports.

5 Comments:

At 1:26 PM, Blogger D L Ennis said...

This is a very funny piece Bob...well done!
DL

 
At 2:16 PM, Blogger marketa said...

i thought that David was stupid when he dated my sister and then dumber when he had twins with her 2 years ago and never spent time with them or gave any child support. Now Im glad that he's finally out of her life and the girls altogether, if a judge sentences them appropriately.

 
At 2:15 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

aged at arrest david f. sprinkle has for 47 years continually abused the system, his life is a shame to the public in general, abuse of people to ones own means is an atrocity to the human race (less lone the pockets of the taxpayer supporting him in jail at the hefty price tag of about $60.000 a year and then the children his produced will be the burden for someone to bear). the first time a man is deemed a habitual offender he should be sterilized by the state like they ust to do girls at bonaire when they were considered promiscuous. what the men in theses days and times do is to further their goals is atrocious. what happens when these children start asking questions about their father? do you say he is dead or tell them the truth, he was a three time convicted felon in prison for the rest of their and his life? someone out there tell me how life for them is fair!

 
At 2:25 PM, Blogger junkme07 said...

aged at arrest david f. sprinkle has for 47 years continually abused the system, his life is a shame to the public in general, abuse of people to ones own means is an blight to the human race (less lone the pockets of the taxpayer supporting him in jail at the hefty price tag of about $60.000 a year and then the children his produced will be the burden for someone to bear). the first time a man is deemed a habitual offender he should be sterilized by the state like they ust to do girls at bonaire when they were considered promiscuous. what the men in theses days and times do is to further their goalat any cost and at the mercy of anyone he can victimize. what happens when these children start asking questions about their father? do you say he is dead or tell them the truth, he was a three time convicted felon in prison for the rest of th his life and theirs? someone out there tell me how life for them is fair!

 
At 5:52 AM, Blogger Daniel said...

These are not good from any sense this should be stopped bank robberies in the world is increasing day by day

 

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home