Lynchburg Virginia’s Top Ten Technorati Picks
There is the rest of the world then there is Lynchburg,. In Lynchburg we see things different, and the Lynchburg Technorati Top Ten takes on a different meaning down here. And since we have found you like reading our Top Ten, it is becoming a Saturday feature, that may or may not continue. So again here we go with Lynchburg’s version, the proper southern version, of Tecbnorati’s top ten.
1. Serenity: In Lynchburg serenity is a trip to the Blue Ridge Mountains. Its peaceful and quiet there until you spot those UFO’s on their way to a landing field in Porto Rico.
2. Maureen Dowd: A Yankee writer from the Big Apple that says men just want their mommy. We are not mommy boys in Lynchburg, we are southern boys, Mommies are called ma, And we often say “we want ma grits.” We do not have to want our Ma, our Ma is bringing more grits.
3. Friendster: Is some kind of community that needs friends. We may join them, you can never have too many friends, unless they are Yankees. In Lynchburg, we tell Yankees to go home. The rest of the world sometimes says this too. They learned it from Lynchburg.
4. Bill Bennett: A writer of virtues we all aspire to have, Some us in Lynchburg find this a rocky road. Bill himself fell down on this rocky road, but he seems to be getting up again. Some of our virtues may be different than his, but we respect his efforts. And we do like rocky road ice cream.
5. Paul Krugman : the way it is: We think Paul Krugman may be related to Henny Penny. Henny Penny kept yelling the sky is falling, Paul seems to think the world is going to heck in a hen basket. At least that’s the way he thinks it’s the way it is.
6. Thomas Friedman: We think he is a Yankee Chess player, he recently wrote about an article about the end game in Iraqi. We think he should go back to the beginning game, and then to the middle game. We think we have him in check, and check mate will soon follow.
7. David Brooks: We think he is a sports writer for the New York Times. He last wrote an article called the “Designated Hitter,” it seems like one of the players had to sit on the bench, his name was Tom Delay. Tom Delay was batting 500, when something happened in his farm team in Texas. They called him back to Texas so he could explain what happened with some of the team’s money.
8. Steve-o: Steve-o was born on a tennis court in England, from there he became a clown. Our advice is not to do this at home in Lynchburg.
9. Judith Miller: Judith Miller has been just let out of jail for keeping her mouth shut. About something she said earlier. We believe in the First Amendment you have the right to say what you please. We also believe that you have the right to keep your mouth shut.
10. Google: Google is an organized effort to take over the earth. They plan to call it Google earth. Already, they found how to get on everyone's computer. Lynchburg Virginia is trying to do the same. Will it be Google earth or Lynchburg Virginia earth. Our bet is on Lynchburg. We also bet the south would win the war.