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Monday, January 16, 2006

A Satanist for Governor

A conservative Satanist? I guess you learn something new everyday. Move over Jesse "The Body" Ventura. I think Jonathan "The Impaler" Sharkey has you has you down for the count on the ring of weird Minnesota politics. "The Impaler" is running for governor of Minnesota in 2006.

He is a Satanist. He is a vampire. He is a witch. He serves Lucifer, and he despises "God the Father". In fact, he calls God his enemy. Oh yeah, and he's pro states rights, opposed to abortion as a form of birth control, and tough (extremely tough) on crime and terrorism (though he opposes the war in Iraq). He's a walking contradiction, or at least it seems.

His platform consists of thirteen primary points.

Improve education

Provide grants and tax breaks for farmers so they can remain competitive

Start an anti-drug task force

Improve benefits for veterans (of which he, himself, is one)

Protect the Minnesota National Guard from going to Iraq (He will defy orders from President Bush if he has to)

Impale on a pole at the state capital any terrorists caught in Minnesota (He challenges the U.S.D.O.J. to try and stop him. He says if prosecuted, surely the jury would be on his side. The Feds can remove the bodies from the pole)

Blacklist companies that leave the U.S. to do business

Enforce tougher punishment for DWI/DUI (3 months in jail)

Protect all religious beliefs (He would erect a "wall of religious beliefs" where he would display every religious creed from the Wiccan Rede to the Ten Commandments)

Promote judicial reform (hold judges accountable for bad decisions and imprison people who file false complaints)

Establish casinos for revenue

Reduce medical care costs

He says that he developed a "Deep hatred for God the Father" on Oct. 26th, 1986, when his grandmother died, three weeks after he booted his first wife and child out of the house. Later, four months after he remarried, he discarded his second wife because of her hatred toward his son. Then he befriended another woman who was addicted to drugs. He says he tried to help her beat the addiction, but, although she tried, she wouldn't quit. Finally, for reasons not addressed, the woman betrayed him by having him unjustly incarcerated for 150 days. That's when he devoted his life "to serving Lucifer". He went to the dark side. He hates God because he says it was God who caused Judas to betray Christ.

But he doesn't use his "dark side" for wrong doing, he insists. Rather, because of his personal experiences, he prefers to use vampyrism and witchcraft to "attack those who prey on the innocent". He wants to protect women, children, and the elderly. Jonathan "The Impaler" Sharkey seeks to fight crime by making the criminals "realize first hand that there is someone more evil than they are, who cares about the safety and well being of the innocent."

I suppose "The Impaler" leaves me scratching my head. On one hand, well, he's a Satanist. He admits to serving the devil. He hates God. On the other hand, at least he admits it. At least he's honest. If only a smidgen of Washington politicians admitted, like he does, to being God-haters, then maybe just maybe, the face of politics would begin to change for the better. I find it ironic that a Satanist in this country would have a closer understanding of justice than many of the myriad of practicing lawyers, judges, legislatures, and executives who spurn high positions of authority everyday. Although I would never endorse Mr. Sharkey's campain, I can't help but feel that if he were governor of Florida, for example, that Teri Schiavo would still be alive today.


At 9:57 PM, Blogger thebluestbutterfly said...

I have been following this story also & plan to write more about it. I have friends who are considering moving there & I am a little worried about it....though the facts that you just presented give a calmer picture than the story that I read.

At 11:02 PM, Blogger B O B said...

Just amazing and leaves me speechless.

At 11:04 PM, Blogger Melissa O. Markham said...

I had heard about this and your post fills in some blanks. I would not be surprised to see this guy win. Minnesotans like to be different and if Jesse Ventura could win, anyone can!

The honesty is refreshing, to be sure!

At 11:19 PM, Blogger Jeff said...

I first saw this story yesterday and ahve been reading about him. His platform is outstanding, and one for which I would vote. His personality seems to be typical of the attentiion seekers normally found in the High Schools wearing all black, exuding teen angst and claiming to be Wiccan High Priestesses. He may very well be a Satanist, and that is his perogitive. Satanism is a federally recognized religion. Of course Satanism is also one of those religions that seem to attract the wanna-be freaks and societal neer-do-wells. (Christianity, Islam and Wicca, are the other big "Freak Draws")

If this guy is serious about his politics, then he may not make a bad Governor. If he is truly a Satanist, and not just doing weird crap, acting stupid and dressing in all black for appearance purposes, then I have no problem with him. If he wants to drink blood...well, I think it is icky, but hey, if that is all he drinks in office then we are good to go.

Anyone who has actually read the Satanic Bible by Church of Satan founder Anton LaVey will recognize many similarities. I have. It is an amusing read. LaVey was a Master Showman on par with PT Barnum. He lived his life to excess and that was his whole schtick. Satanism is not the big baby killing bug-a-boo that Hollywood has portayed it to be. Satanism is a sarcastic mirror image of Christianity. The best description I can give of Satanism is that reminds me of an old beer commercial. "You only go around once in this it to the fullest."

And I think I am startng to like this fellow more and more. Maybe Tim Cain should take a few notes.

At 6:26 AM, Blogger C.T. said...

in response to some of these comments, I have to say that although I find his story interesting, no, I don't think he's a great guy nor do I think he's worthy of consideration. I simply find it ironic that in some ways he may be a better statesmen than the status quo seems to be. He actually has a sense of good and evil, although I could never trust his judgements in that area. I think the emphasis shouldn't be how great he is, but rather, how deficient most other elected officials prove to be. At least the Impaler has convictions that he's not afraid to act on.

At 6:59 PM, Blogger Lourdes B. Sharkey-Flash said...

Lourdes B. Sharkey-Flash said...

Jonathon The Impaler Sharkey,
Is nothing more than a con artist.
Woman stalker,and cross dresser. I should know I am his only legal wife (Unfortunately ). He has refused to give me a divorce he is also a dead beat father who has refused to pay any child support, for as long as i can remember it's now been closed to a year or longer and before he would send what he wanted when he wanted to.
He stalked Susan and He stalked me when i first left him
then he shows up at my house in Tampa dressed as a woman, to included fake breasts, and hair cut like Kathy Lee, I told him to get the hell out. That's when he left Indiana and violated probation. He drove all the way to Tampa dressed as a woman. He actually told me, He wanted to get a sex change, But wanted me to continue to live with him in a lesbian relationship to which, I responded that he was crazy.
And left him He abused his own kids and my children from a previous marriage, phisically, when I found out it gave me another reason to leave him. I don't know how many restraining orders I have had to get against this man in New Jersey and Florida. He is mentally unbalanced, And there is no such person as Kat.
That's a persona that he invented and used his poor dead little sisters name. So he could harass women under that name. The man is a full blown psyco, and he is dangerous. How the election board would ever let someone like him run for governor or president is beyond me. They must need to have their heads examine. This man is the worst thing that can happen to any woman or child. And as far as feeding on women and having fangs he is so full of it, He does all this just to get in the spotlight, because he knows people love to chase on drama and lunatics like him. He is nothing more than a Dead Beat Father, who refuses to send his kids child support, and a cross dressing lunatic. That's all the White House would need. Like we don't already have enough problems
But I would love to see him all dressed up for a party at the white house fake breasts and all. It's a hilarious site to behold. He makes the ugliest woman this side of the world.
If you want anymore info you can contact me. 813-420-7247
Thank you


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